Confusion at its best.

I don't know what to do anymore...
Whatever perspective I may think of...
It all ends at the same ending... Disappointment...
Everything's crushing me to a pulp again...

Rather than being the friend you couldn't resist...
I feel as if I'm a stalker...
What would you think if someone would wait for you at school everyday?
I think I made a big mistake...

Though she's not complaining about it...
I know deep inside that she's starting to get irritated...
I don't want to get her the wrong idea...
Maybe I shouldn't have acted so differently...
She saw in me someone different...
Someone who would sacrifice everything for her...
Someone who is not the real Ram...

I changed, no questions asked...
I feel as if I don't even know myself either...
The person who was always a happy go lucky guy turned into a whole new person...

I'll fix this all...
I'm backtracking to the old self...
Someone who was always a friend...
Someone who was not a stalker...
Someone who showed his real colors rather than showing off something that in truth that he isn't...
Someone who would love a person without any changes in his own self...
The real Ram... The person who she met last semester...
The person that always brought "bread stix" for everyone...

I never should have changed if I would know it would come to this...
I'm bringing my old self but with a little taste of the new...
I want to change but not something that will turn me into someone else...

*Meditating...*