Dismissal...

It's over...
No reason to stay and wait...
No more reason for anything...
I cant reach her before... now, she's starting to stray from me...

I'm an idiot...
I'm the world's number one moron...
I deserve a trophy...
A trophy of rejection...

When she was in a spider's web...
My mindless heart took over me...
I said the words... the words that was never supposed to be spoken...
But it was inevitable, I had to say it one time or another...

I was rushing things too much...
I never thought what she was in...
I just said it without any regret...
Now what do I get? Rejection of course...

First was confusion, now depression...
If I could just backtrack....
So I could stop myself...
---------------------------------------------------------------------

Here's pretty much what happened...

November 23, 2008... 3:29 in the afternoon...
I said the words that was hiding in my mind...
The words that was supposed to be kept in locks until the time was right...
I rushed too much...

3:31...
She asked me what do I meant by I like her a lot...
I said I like her as more of a friend...
I apologized for saying it at the wrong moment...

3:32 until 3:45...
We talked for a short while on when did I first start to like her...
I felt like a moron in between those minutes...
I was feeling that she was going to turn back...
so I prepared for the worse...

3:45...
She asked me on why can she attract some people that are not close to her...
I answered that she can dazzle people...
Then the painful line came...
She said she can't dazzle all people and she thanked me...
finally... she apologized if she can't give herself...
we both know what situation was she in... problems with some of her friends because of some person who tried to challenge all of her friends... I'm not going to say the reasons anymore...

3:51...
She had to go...
She said thanks for all of what I did...
She left... my world fell apart once again...
But not as worse as before...
----------------------------------------------------------------

I thought so...
This really did end with a plane crash...
Good thing I didn't expect anything from her in return or else... I could have been dead by now...
Yes, I'm hurt once again inside...
Love isn't really on my side...
I must be a black sheep on this...
I'm a magnet for disappointment...
I attract sadness and retract happiness...
My world is full of downs...

I guess this will take some time before I get over this...
Pain strikes my heart once again...