Did you ever wonder...

Did you ever wonder on why history was called history and not herstory?

Did you ever wonder that even though the female population outnumbers the men population, there is only a small number of women that lead?

Did you ever wonder why female writers we're so hard to find back then?

Did you ever wonder on why women wear stilletos even though it causes great pain?

Did you ever wonder on why the abbreviation "Ms." is changed to "Mrs." once she is married and yet the abbreviation "Mr." is not changed regardless of single or married?

Did you ever wonder why did the abbreviation "Mr." is always first instead of "Mrs." in invitations?

Did you ever wonder on what the world will be if it was led by women?

Did you ever wonder on why did man blame God for creating woman when they we're asked why they ate from the tree of knowledge?

So many questions left in my mind but all points to one reason.

Our world has been in utter chaos since the beginning.

Wars.

Corruption.

Unwanted deaths.

Destruction.

All of these happened under the rule of man.

When a man claims a higher position, he is praised.

When a woman claims a higer position, she must go through hell to even hear a single cheer.

Ever since the beginning, man has already claimed supremacy.

Ever wondered why it was called "Man and Woman" and not "Woman and Man"?

And for centuries, man has claimed the highest chair.

Throughout time, man has created outstanding marvels and claimed all glory for himself.

Man even created reasons and lies and contraptions to make him more supreme as ever.

I'm not going against my own gender or anything.

I'm just sharing on what I think.

You decide.

Oh yeah, did you know men created stilletos and not women?

And there is a special reason on why men love seeing women wearing stilletos.

And I'm not going to say why. Discover it for yourself.

Ego to blame.

It's the one who curses people day by day.

It's the one that wishes it had the capabilities beyond others.

It's the one that doesn't want to accept its own defeat.

It's the one that has a pride larger than any great wall.

It's the one that messes with your mind.

It's your ego and it can destroy your life.

Before, never did I thought that my life was ruled by my own ego.

Never giving a care to the ones I hurt.

Ignoring the ones who asked for help.

Criticizing anyone who made mistakes.

Justifying that my own mistakes should be correct.

I ignored my own wrongdoings and went on with my life.

Letting my own stupidity rule over my acts and thoughts.

Now that I finally managed to look behind the path I made, I see nothing but chaos.

On one side are the people that curses me to death.

On another side are the people I used for my own purposes without giving anything back or at least my own gratitude.

And finally, I look back on the people I've hurt so much.

I used to think that they we're the ones who hurt me first.

I gave myself a reason to hate them back not knowing that all this drama was the product of my own mind.

I hated them through ignorance, ignoring them as if no one occupied the space in front of me.

Never giving a care if my ignorance also hurt them back.

But thanks to that kid, that smiling kid, my ego crashed like a plane falling from the heavens above.

Giving me a taste of how painful can the gods hammer be.

And I waked up from a long trance.

A nightmare that played for years.

Although I can never swallow my own pride, with a little help, I broke it down without any hesitation.

The ego that smiles with the sight of chaos is no more.

All the stupidity I've done, all the pain I've caused, all the chaos I've commited, all of them I completely apologize for.

And though you may never want to forgive me as long as your soul exists, just grant me one wish and don't do what I've done to you...